When Marcus and I first found out I was pregnant a lot of questions arose. Will I continue working? Can I be a full time work at home Mom? You know, all the really fun serious questions.
I knew I always wanted to be able to stay at home with my baby, however I also knew that I had hopes and dreams that were important to me.
Do I just give up on them?
I thought long and hard on this question. I had to work, that wasn’t an option. But I wanted to work. It’s silly–but I really enjoy working and what I do. Was it wrong of me to continue chasing my own hopes and dreams while raising a baby? Shouldn’t they just be put on the back burner, that’s what good Moms do. Their babies always come first. I mean that is what I had always been told and heard it should be.
Well, flash forward to nine months later and a beautiful healthy baby.
She’s my world. She always comes first, but I’ve found a balance and I’m here to tell you, your hopes and dreams do NOT have to end because you’re a Mom.
It’s a crazy thought right? I’m totally serious though. We often struggle with this idea, this thought that our wants, our goals and our dreams HAVE to be placed on the “this will happen later shelf” once we become a Mother. It’s not true though. Why can’t you do both?
It doesn’t mean it’s not going to be hard because well, it’s going to be REALLY hard. I remember thinking how? How am I going to balance that? Well, my baby is now almost one and though some days are longer and harder than others we make it work. It’s all about sacrifices and trade offs. You have to find a balance that works for you and one that makes you happy.
Because guess what, your hopes, dreams and happiness matter. They’re important too.
It’s okay to have hopes and dreams when you’re a Mom and it’s definitely okay to chase those hopes and dreams.
I think if anything it makes us strong, it teaches our babies to go after anything and everything they want. To not give up, but to push forward even through the hard times and to work, work and work until they reach their dreams.
Make sure you have a great group of supporters behind you, remind yourself you deserve this and you CAN do this and then do it! I’ve learned three big things to making this a success, they are as follows:
- WRITE YOUR PLAN OUT. It’s no different than any other goal, writing it out makes a huge difference. Only this time include motherhood in it. How are you going to make it happen while being a Mom? Write down every detail, a schedule (including you time) and who you’re going to have be your biggest supporter and motivator (besides yourself and your baby(ies).
- SET PRIORITIES. These are key. What comes first? Your family and your baby. What comes second? Third? Fourth? How are you going to make sure these priorities stay in order while still making your goal a reality?
- MAKE TIME. This is the biggest and most challenging one. Make the time. Even if it’s after the babe goes to bed, during nap time or while they’re at Grandma and Grandpa’s. Set time aside every single day to work on it. Make it a priority and make it happen.
I think so many of us think we have to put our goals and dreams on hold and it’s totally not the case, AT ALL. We can be excellent Mothers while still achieving the dreams and goals we’ve had since long before they were here. That doesn’t make us a bad Mom, that doesn’t mean we love our babies any less. My baby is my world, I would do and drop anything for her, but there’s a balance and I’m making it happen WITH HER by my side.