Throughout this pregnancy I have experienced, highs, lows, and in betweens. It’s been the best thing that’s ever happened to me and one of the hardest. Some may say you’re not supposed to say that, that you’re supposed to be happy, happy, happy, but I’m just being real. However, I think it’s important I say this first, overall I couldn’t be more thankful or happier to be carrying this sweet baby girl and to be becoming a Mother in just a couple of months. I’ve wanted this for so long and it’s the most amazing, miraculous blessing–I can’t wait to meet her!
But that one thing I’ve learned from these seven months of pregnancy is to be comfortable with change and accept the imperfections in life. I’m a little bit of a type-A perfectionist, just ask my dear, patient husband. I like things to be in order, I’m a bigger planner and try my hardest to have everything lined up perfectly for the next step or activity of life. The last seven months though, have not gone as I had them planned though. In fact they’ve gone the complete opposite. (and I want to make clear, getting pregnant wasn’t one of them–we wanted that and prayed for it for years, I’m talking life in general) Now, you better believe this has been hard for me and a little discouraging at times. But I am starting to figure out that these little trials and bumps in the road are put in your life for a reason. As hard as it may be to see that while they’re happening, one day we will look back and see the reason we had them. Though things aren’t perfect still and probably never will be I am slowly learning to accept the imperfections in my life, to be comfortable with change. The reality is, sometimes things aren’t going to go as planned. Whether it be during my pregnancy, my work, or any aspect of my life. The biggest thing you have to hold onto is faith. Without faith what is life?
I was sitting in church yesterday listening to a lesson and heard the words, “Trust in God and his plan for you”. I think that was my moment of realizing, Jess chill. Things aren’t always going to be perfect and go according to the plan that I have in my head. Sometimes they’re hard, really hard. But somehow they work, every single time. It doesn’t mean that it’s going to work easily, in fact most times it doesn’t–because that wouldn’t make you stronger or teach you a lesson, but you always get through it and things always make their way back to glimpses of beautiful. I think that sometimes we just get so stuck in the negative, in focusing on everything that’s going wrong in our life, that we forget there is also so much good. I took the time yesterday to make a list of everything I have in my life that I am grateful for. I highly recommend it for everyone, even if things are currently going smoothly. It really just puts things into perspective and reminds you how beautiful things really are or can be.
Now, I am no expert, in fact I am far from it. But this is why I write, this is why I share. I share my experiences, my journey through life and how I am figuring things out. I don’t do it to tell you how to live, we all have to choose what’s best for us and our individual situations. But this is my joy, what’s best for me and I love sharing and learning things about myself and life along the way.
I can’t wait to be a Mom and honestly I think this lesson of learning to accept change and live with imperfections came at the perfect time. I am still learning, it didn’t just click over night (though I totally wish). But with Motherhood comes both of those things, so it’s important for me to have the knowledge of it now and have that seed planted. So this weeks goal, enjoy every little moment, push the worries out of my mind and take things as they come. I have to take each day at a time and not think so much into the future, that’s what stresses me out. The reality is, you can’t control what the future has in store for you–so why let it bring you down or effect your happiness now? It’s hard, definitely hard, but I’m all about challenging myself and this is one that I think will be good for me and my little family. So I’ll document it over on Instagram for anyone wanting to follow along. It all goes back to our main campaign, #dontwastehappy.